A self-reminder

2013 has started out strong, for a lack of a better word, for my family... It has shown me how we can always pull through when we think we cannot and that we are always there for each other during difficult times. In light of this I would like to post a poem by Octavian Paler. (a Romanian writer and poet). My mom introduced me to this poem after my grandmother passed away a couple years ago. Although its quite lengthy, it helped me stay grounded and remind myself of the important things in life.
I hope it touches someone else too.



We have timeby Octavian Paler

We have time for everything:to sleep, to run from one place to another,
to regret having mistaken and to mistake again,
to judge the others and to forgive ourselves,
we have time for reading and writing, for making corrections to our texts, to regret ever having written,
we have time to make plans and never respect them, we have time to make illusions and gamble through their ashes later on.

We have time for ambitions and illnesses, to blame it all on fate and details,

we have time to watch the clouds, advertisements or some ordinary accident,

we have time to chase our wonders away and to postpone the answers,

we have time to break a dream to pieces and then to reinvent it,

we have time to make friends - and lose them,we have time to learn our lessons and then forget them quickly afterwards, 

we have time to be given gifts and not understand them.

We have time for them all.

But there is no time for just a drop of tenderness.

When we are about to get to that too – we die.

I have learned some things during my lifetime, experiences that I am now sharing with you.

I have learned that you cannot make somebody love you;

All you can do is be the beloved one.

Everything else, depends on the others.

I have learned that no matter how much I might care,

Others might not care at all.

I have learned that it could take years to earn somebody’s confidence

And only a few seconds to lose it.

I have learned that it is not WHAT you have in life,

But WHO is there for you to have.

I have learned that charm could be of use for only about 15 minutes,

Afterwards, you better know something.

I have learned that you should never compare yourself to what others can do better than you, 

but with what you can do yourself;

I have learned that what happens to the others is not as important as what I can do to help;

I have learned that in whatever way you might cut things,

They will always turn out to have two sides;

I have learned that when you have to depart from your dearest ones, you should do it with the warmest words;

It could be the last time you see them.

I have learned that you could carry on for a long time

After stating you cannot take it any longer;

I have learned that heroes are those who do what is right, when they ought to, regardless of the consequences;

I have learned that there are people who love you

But do not know how to show it;

I have learned that when I am upset I have the RIGHT to be so

But I do not have the right to be mean as well;

I have learned that true friendship continues to exist even when great distances are involved

And that goes for true love too.

I have learned that, if somebody does not love you the way you might want to be loved,

It does not mean they do not love you with all their heart.

I have learned that no matter how good a friend might be to you,

They will inevitably hurt you from time to time

And you will have to forgive;

I have learned that it is not always enough to be forgiven by others,

Sometimes you must learn how to forgive your own self;

I have learned that, regardless of how much you might suffer,

The world will never cease running because of your pain.

I have learned that the past and circumstances could alter your personality,

But it is certainly YOU to be held responsible for what you become;

I have learned that, if two people argue, it does not mean they do not love each other,

As well as their arguing would not prove that they are not in love.

I have learned that you should sometimes put a person in first place

And not their deeds;

I have learned that two persons could be watching the very same thing

And perceive two totally different meanings;

I have learned that, in spite of any consequences,

Those who are fair and honest with themselves reach higher peaks in life;

I have learned that one’s life could be changed in only a few hours’ time

By people who might have never even known them;

I have learned that when you believe there is nothing more you could offer,

You will always find the strength to help a friend who is in need.

I have learned that writing,

Just like speaking,

Could soothe your inner pain.

I have learned that the ones you hold dearest

Are taken away from you far too soon…

I have learned that it is far too difficult to realize

Where to draw the borders between kindness, not hurting the other and firmly sustaining your ideas.

I have learned to love

In order to be loved in my turn.

A Good Start :)

The holiday season wraps up and 2013 begins...

Oh how I have missed spending time with family and being able to fully relax. I wrote the USMLE Step 1 a month ago, received my mark last week ( I PASSED :) ) and then proceeded to sleep 16 hours straight! I didn't realize how anxious and stressed I was until I had finally got the much anticipated email. The studying paid off and I am happy to have started 2013 on such a good note! 

I am currently working on a research paper (one of Saba's new requirements before starting clinical rotations) - the only thing standing in the way of me being in the hospital.

Being home is great, seeing family was wonderful but I noticed everyone has the same question for me "what type of doctor do you want to be?". Such a hard question to answer. If you asked me this 2 years ago I would've said one of two things: Surgeon or ophthalmologist. It was an easy answer. Now? not so much. Ophthalmology is ridiculously competitive, and I'm trying to be realistic. Surgery still sounds appealing - except for those dreaded hours and the fact that I would be spending the rest of my life in the hospital. The one thing I realized about myself in the last two years living on Saba was that I love to live a balanced life. I love to be outdoors, to hike, to go diving, to enjoy a nice meal. I love to always be active. I was never happy when I had to study 24/7 and never leave my house. Of course, there is always a trade off and there are times where you need to do it. I was alway more productive after a workout. So to sum up my ramblings... I don't know if the surgery lifestyle would fit with what I know makes me happy. I'm still going to keep an open mind to surgery because I think I will still like it but I think I will also be interested in Obsetrics/gynecology and paediatrics. 

My friend found a medical specialty aptitude test from Virginia School of Medicine (click here to try it).  It's based off of 130 questions relating to your personality. Below are my top 20 ... I think there was something wrong with the 1st choice. Radiology? me? No thanks, I like being around people. Other than that the choices were interesting :)

Hope everyone had a great christmas and new year celebration! Good luck to those going back/starting Saba! Looking forward to being an active blogger once again with the upcoming excitement of clinical rotations.